Keeping it simple for you

 

 

  While I am still navigating through the tides, I often meet and interact with people who cheer me for every little step. They strengthen my confidence and make an effort to put a smile on my face. With them, I play that side of myself which the world wants to see. At times, there are filters, there could be mixed emotions, but never do I hesitate to gulp in my worries and portray a smile. Maybe that is how I would like to continue seeing myself. It doesn’t harm, but it does take some effort. Those instances come and go. It’s not that I disrespect them, but I don’t take them back home. I live those moments at that time for those people. They help! And then, there are  you all  I count on, I rely on more than anything. I don’t stop myself from connecting and asking. Since you have seen the downside, you care and make every bit of your presence valuable. You let me share my worries and anchor me with direction. I owe you a lot in whatever way I can, since you stood like a ...

  https://www.facebook.com/share/r/1ChjrQnYWu/?mibextid=wwXIfr What a coincidence… These words echoed so closely to what you said when you last spoke to my mom. It felt as though, in that moment, through teary eyes, you were able to express your emotions more clearly than ever before…  Blessed to have you both in my life!  My heart still holds the hope that you'll someday hug me and say, "Thanks for waiting"

The weight of your absence I try not to sink beneath it, but without your embrace, I cry for something to pull me out. Voices echo: “Your soul won’t find solace if I remain in pain.” But how can I not miss the heart that once smiled because of you, your presence, and your warmth? I am trying not to whine, I am trying not to break, I am trying not to fall apart. But, my love, tell me, if you may, how can I anchor myself without your arms to even share my pain? I know there are no answers to the whys  that fog my mind. Yet I am tired, and deep within I’m leaning on others to pull me through. I know this is not the me I was.... but where is me  when there is no we anymore? I miss you my Love :( 

The tug between what’s urgent now and what’s needed for the long road ahead drains the strength I try so hard to protect. I reach for healthier ways to cope, to not weigh myself down, but still, I stumble. The path dims, and I lose my way. When someone tells me, “You’re strong,” I pause. I rewind my memories, trying to see what they see. How am I strong when I can’t rebuild myself every time the restlessness returns? When I still lean on others to pull me through? In silence, my thoughts swell dark, heavy, and frightening. And yet I must learn to live inside that loneliness. I ache for the warmth of those moments I once held close, but I know I must endure without them, maybe until the very end. It feels like being cast into an ocean of darkness, unsure if any light exists beyond. Does it? I shouted at mom to hear my fears, to guide me out; was that wrong? Maybe not. Maybe it’s time I stop leaning on shoulders and learn to stand on my own. I’m grateful for those who care, but I can’t l...

Some bonds are not meant to be defined; only felt, only honored. They exist quietly, just beyond words, with boundaries so subtle they never confine, yet hold a trust that never needs to be asked for. They offer a space; soft and still, where one can simply be. To be heard without noise, to be seen without needing light. In the rise and fall of everyday tides, they remain; not to lead, not to follow, but simply to walk beside. There is strength in their silence, and grace in their simplicity. And through it all, the bond only deepens, growing in the places where nothing is said, but everything is known. With all the quiet respect my heart can hold, I thank you again and again(even if you ask me not to :) ) for being that presence in my life. If I come often, speak freely, or stay longer than the moment expects,  know that it is only because I feel safe, not because I ask for more. 

 T wasn't the right time… Just when I'd begun to gather the pieces of myself, To breathe without flinching, To believe again.... This storm came, uninvited. I was ready to brave the odds, Maybe not all, but enough… But this breaks the surface beneath my feet. It pulls me under when I had just begun to swim. I am not weak. But even the strong, sink sometimes  :(

It’s 13:31, and I should be fast asleep, but instead, I find myself wide awake, with a pen in hand, thoughts flowing freely.  It's odd but something definitely feels different today.  The worries are still there, unchanged, sitting where I left them. But the past 48 hours brought a kind of strength I hadn't felt in a long time; subtle, may even be fragile, but very real. Or may be it was always there and I overshadowed (well, that's not my version but this is what I retained in these 48 hours).  I still see the hurdles ahead. The route remains uncertain, but something about sharing my fears, voicing my worries, brought a flicker of light into the tunnel I’ve dreaded walking alone. You probably don’t realize how much your presence, your voice, matters to me but I need to say it: even a moment of connection, even the smallest drop of relief from the weight I carry, travels with me a long way. I've laid bare my fears, my doubts, the things that hold me back. And still, you...

 Nana Bou, Teachers day may have passed but your teachings remain forever. This is from Us to You 🙇‍♀️ However rough the ocean may be, you have taught us to sail through: with or without a kayak,
 with or without a keel,
 with or without a compass to steer. Life has hurled us into storms
that many would never dare to face, yet your patience and perseverance have guided us to stand fearless: with or without a clue,
 with or without a plan,
 with or without a map in hand. And from this day forward we promise to rise,
to never again shrink from the fight: with or without a shield,
 with or without a sword,
 with or without a flame to light our way. Your SSN :)

In the Void... Ji, I’m starting a new chapter today... A chapter shaped by responsibility, a chapter that speaks only in silence. Your voice echoes in the void, wishing me luck and yet, somewhere deep inside, it tares me to piece. I know I shouldn't worry, because you are always with me. But in the silence I struggle, a silence I’m not ready for. In your warmth, I’ve faced the world. Now, I will rise and stand against all odds. No matter where life takes me, I promise I won’t let you down. So... wish me luck not because I ask for it, but because I know it’s always there..... guiding me, as I walk a path with no map. I miss you so much baba... Stay well my love :x

Unaware of the Where.... . I may have accepted the truth, Yet how real it feels, I cannot say. The facts remain, but I can’t find my place in them; Their weight is vague, Their echo unbearable. I’m moving forward, or so I claim..... But the ground beneath me still wavers. I know you're there... Where, I do not know. Life was once painted in color, And perhaps we still try to add more. But every tie-dye we once made together Now ceases to fade.. As if time, too, refuses to let go. I reach deep within to release the sorrow, Yet I cling to the breath that steadies me. The breath you once shared, The warmth that lived in your embrace.. Now lives only in the threads you left behind. And still, a sudden chill steals even that away. Cast away... to cast a way. Nurture my steps from wherever you are. I try to move, truly I do... But something holds me still. Stay with me, forever, my love. I know you're there, Only... unaware of the where.💔

speaking to a presence that no longer reassures ....  an unsteady pillar that once held me strong.   It’s been a month… A month of fighting, of being irritable and restless — but only to be met with silence. It’s been a month of talking, sharing, and breaking down — but only into empty space, no arms to hold the heaviness. It’s been a month of smiling, laughing, pretending — but only in front of an unsteady pillar that no longer leans back. The clock keeps ticking, alarms ring, reminders buzz — but there’s no one to be picked up, no one to return. Even the warmth I find in these fragile comforts, feels unfamiliar, even frightening — because fear now hides in everything and nothing. Still, I promise to rise, to gather the strength you once believed I had. I will try to be strong for the kids, for our life. But I need to ask…   You said you'd come back for our kids — can you assure me that your hands are still guiding them, blessing them, protecting them? You don’...

In sterile halls where silence weeps, A body bruised, the soul it keeps, Pain wraps tight, a ruthless chain, A whispered hope amidst the strain. The beeping sounds, the nights so long, The weight of fear where we belong, Yet in the dark, a steady light, A hand that pulls us through the night. Family & Friends stand close with love so deep, Their voices soft, the tears they keep, Like pillars strong, they hold us near, A quiet strength to calm our fear. Nurses, Bosses , angels in disguise, With gentle hands and knowing eyes, Their care, a balm for wounds unseen, A healing touch, so kind, serene. In moments bleak, when all feels lost, They walk besides us, at no cost, In every breath, in every tear, Their love, a force that draws us near. So through the pain, we’ll rise once more, With those who held is, hearts restore, In every trial, we now can see, How love and care sets us free.