Keeping it simple for you

 T wasn't the right time… Just when I'd begun to gather the pieces of myself, To breathe without flinching, To believe again.... This storm came, uninvited. I was ready to brave the odds, Maybe not all, but enough… But this breaks the surface beneath my feet. It pulls me under when I had just begun to swim. I am not weak. But even the strong, sink sometimes  :(

It’s 13:31, and I should be fast asleep, but instead, I find myself wide awake, with a pen in hand, thoughts flowing freely.  It's odd but something definitely feels different today.  The worries are still there, unchanged, sitting where I left them. But the past 48 hours brought a kind of strength I hadn't felt in a long time; subtle, may even be fragile, but very real. Or may be it was always there and I overshadowed (well, that's not my version but this is what I retained in these 48 hours).  I still see the hurdles ahead. The route remains uncertain, but something about sharing my fears, voicing my worries, brought a flicker of light into the tunnel I’ve dreaded walking alone. You probably don’t realize how much your presence, your voice, matters to me but I need to say it: even a moment of connection, even the smallest drop of relief from the weight I carry, travels with me a long way. I've laid bare my fears, my doubts, the things that hold me back. And still, you...

 Nana Bou, Teachers day may have passed but your teachings remain forever. This is from Us to You 🙇‍♀️ However rough the ocean may be, you have taught us to sail through: with or without a kayak,
 with or without a keel,
 with or without a compass to steer. Life has hurled us into storms
that many would never dare to face, yet your patience and perseverance have guided us to stand fearless: with or without a clue,
 with or without a plan,
 with or without a map in hand. And from this day forward we promise to rise,
to never again shrink from the fight: with or without a shield,
 with or without a sword,
 with or without a flame to light our way. Your SSN :)

In the Void... Ji, I’m starting a new chapter today... A chapter shaped by responsibility, a chapter that speaks only in silence. Your voice echoes in the void, wishing me luck and yet, somewhere deep inside, it tares me to piece. I know I shouldn't worry, because you are always with me. But in the silence I struggle, a silence I’m not ready for. In your warmth, I’ve faced the world. Now, I will rise and stand against all odds. No matter where life takes me, I promise I won’t let you down. So... wish me luck not because I ask for it, but because I know it’s always there..... guiding me, as I walk a path with no map. I miss you so much baba... Stay well my love :x

Unaware of the Where.... . I may have accepted the truth, Yet how real it feels, I cannot say. The facts remain, but I can’t find my place in them; Their weight is vague, Their echo unbearable. I’m moving forward, or so I claim..... But the ground beneath me still wavers. I know you're there... Where, I do not know. Life was once painted in color, And perhaps we still try to add more. But every tie-dye we once made together Now ceases to fade.. As if time, too, refuses to let go. I reach deep within to release the sorrow, Yet I cling to the breath that steadies me. The breath you once shared, The warmth that lived in your embrace.. Now lives only in the threads you left behind. And still, a sudden chill steals even that away. Cast away... to cast a way. Nurture my steps from wherever you are. I try to move, truly I do... But something holds me still. Stay with me, forever, my love. I know you're there, Only... unaware of the where.💔