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A burden shared is a burden halved.

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There is a silence… an unspoken, unsettling silence visible in our glances, felt in our pauses, as we hold back emotions that words cannot quite carry. The worldliness of a brother embracing responsibilities, trying to bring cheer to his little sister, making sure she is comfortable and cared for may appear effortless. But the quiet responsibility of a sister, trying to hold the family together while keeping her own emotions tucked away, carries a weight far greater than physical strength. And yet, here we are… three siblings, standing for one another, becoming each other’s cushion when the ground beneath our parents feels uncertain. Perhaps that is what family truly means; not that one person has to be strong all the time, but that when one begins to falter, the others quietly step closer. This time, I am here, hugging him, pampering him, rubbing his feet and palms, making sure he is warm under the blanket. And somewhere in the quiet, my heart sinks when his familiar voice doesn’t ech...
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Silently sinking into life, one day after another, without you.

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Days pass by, one after another, quietly slipping through my hands. And somewhere between them, loneliness sneaks in softly at first, then settling deep within, until my mind begins to understand how lonely life can truly be. The waves, the shores, the endless horizon they all seem to speak of nothingness, of a void that refuses to leave. I compel myself to smile even through those weary nights, pretending I am okay, pretending the ache has learned to fade. Alas, it disappears into thin air only to return with the darkness. I keep the promises I made to myself. I fulfill every condition, hold myself together, keep moving, keep sailing. Yet somehow, all of it seems to end at the smallest hope of being cheered for, of having something to truly celebrate. Trust me, life sails through. It does! But how it does, I have no idea. I try my best, again and again, yet everything seems to go in vain. And I don't mean to dishearten you I only wish you knew that the emptiness is still not heali...
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I miss you!

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Miss you my love 💔 I am moving, nourishing, healing… But in those moments of despair, I am beyond words trying to understand how something so empty can feel when you’re not beside me. I reach for every corner, almost believing you would still be there. Rusty is the feeling when my arms hold nothing, when they instinctively search for you. Some nights, I just want to wake up with you again, because these nights have a way of haunting me. If there were a whistleblower who could carry my cravings to you, I wonder what they would say… At this moment,  Missing you so badly, xoxo boy 😞🥹 I remember my promise. I told you I would be fine. And I am trying. ❤️ But there are moments when I just need to be in that space again to breathe without thinking, to relax without pretending, and to laugh… the way I used to. Just once or more, I wish I could find my way back there. ❤️
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This is for you xoxo boy :)

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  In the irony of life, if there were one moment I could relive, it would be one with you. Amidst all the  hochpoch  and chaos, if there were one place where I found my sanity, it is being wrapped safely in your arms. Between then, now, and everything that lies ahead, if I can still stand tall and smile, it is because of the freedom, strength, and confidence you have given me. You have given me countless moments of courage,    the kind that quietly remind me to keep walking forward, no matter what. I may call you mean, rude, or my  bad boy … but beneath all that teasing is an enormous amount of affection you have showered upon me;  and truthfully, that is what my heart keeps craving for. I will never forget my promise. And within the beautiful boundaries of friendship, trust, and our little world of fun, I would happily remain just the way I am with you:  honest, comfortable, a little demanding, and always ready to ask for just a little more of yo...
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Just to Remember… ❤️

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Do you remember his birthday? 😊 That was the only question I was asked during my first visa interview. I answered confidently, without hesitation, and I still remember the sheepish smile on his face. Later, he confessed that he had been nervous wondering what would happen if I got the date wrong! Since October 2024, I have lost count of how many times I have remembered and mentioned that date. 07.20. ** It’s a Monday today, and we wish you a Happy Birthday. ❤️ We have celebrated some proud moments along the way, Baaplu getting a job, Chinchin performing with happiness, and me stepping into and learning a new role. Life continues to move forward, and yet, the emptiness you left behind doesn’t seem to fade. It feels unbelievable that next Monday, we will be performing your annual rites, your first death anniversary. Gelha, did you really just vanish somewhere into thin air? How can someone who was so much a part of everything simply not be here anymore? I keep myself engaged in every po...
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The Calm in my Chaos :)

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"Is your Chromebook charged?" "Do you have sleeves for your Chromebook and laptop?" "Don't forget your badge." "Hmm... don't you need anything else?" "Oh yes! Can you sharpen the pencils? And I forgot my pens, markers, and highlighters..." "My journal too!" "What's wrong with my Chromebook? Why can't I access my email? Why is this page taking forever to load?" "My handbag is going to be much heavier than I expected." "Why don't you take a backpack?" "What?! Ridiculous! I'm not carrying a backpack like a school kid!" "Are my phone and watch charging?" "What's your plan for lunch tomorrow? Is that sorted?" If you're wondering what kind of chaos this is, it probably sounds like a kindergartner getting ready for the first day of school. 😄 Well... that was exactly the vibe in our house last night. Only this time, I was the one panicking, an...
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From a Promise to a Legacy ❤️

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12.12.2002 … It all began with our wedding, a day filled with sacred vows, dreams, and the promise of forever. Years later, those promises blossomed into a life rich with love, family, laughter, and countless memories. Every picture, every smile, and every milestone became part of our beautiful journey. Then came the day, 07.08.2025, that changed everything. With Shirdi Sai Baba's sacred vibhuti on your forehead, Lord Jagannath's tulsi garland around your neck, the blessed sindoor of Panchamukhi Hanuman, Strength gathered from  Mahavinayak & anything and everything a mother could ask for before Maa Kamakhya Devi, you were surrounded by prayers and divine blessings. You had promised me and our children that you would be brave, that you would fight, and that you would come back to us. Yet, in those final moments, when your voice revealed what my heart was never ready to hear, time seemed to stand still. I still hold on to the promise you made, wondering how fate changed our s...
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