Soul-Torn😢

Back in the grind again… scared of the tasks ahead and overwhelmed by the weight of responsibilities.

Last year, on this very day, we were holding onto each other, promising that no matter what life brought our way, we would never let go. We believed no hardship could break our strength, and together we would face every low and rise back into better days.

When I look back at that moment, gently holding your feet, comforting you, silently promising myself that I would stand beside you, fight for you, and never let anything separate us for years to come, it hurts to realize that today, I no longer even have a reason to look forward to this date.

Piece by piece, I am trying to gather what remains and hold everything together for our children. But the soft whispers of reassurance that once gave me strength are slowly fading into silence.

Time is supposed to heal pain, but how do I explain the weight of a grief that words can barely carry? The rare moments when I laugh or feel like myself again disappear almost instantly, swallowed by the emptiness that follows.

I keep reminding myself to stay strong, to not give in to weakness. Yet the more I try to collect the scattered pieces of myself, the more I realize that those pieces belonged to you… and I cannot find you anywhere.

Can I hold you for a little while longer?
Can you come back, even just for me, for a little while?
Will I ever get the chance to live life with you again?

I never imagined that one day I would be working on the words “ଭାବପୂର୍ବକ ଶ୍ରଦ୍ଧାଞ୍ଜଳି” itself…
Today, my heart feels heavy with memories, grief, and endless love.